I don't know

• So I have finally told my dad about my tuition fees. He said ok, of course he has to say so. Then comes the million-dollar question about my future. "So what's your plan after the studies? Are you going to apply back to EY?" in a persuasive-expecting-a-yes-answer tone.

• Honestly, I just don't know. I just do not have the interest and drive to be an auditor anymore. I honestly feel from the strength of all my core muscles that it is not a healthy life being an auditor in Malaysia, sacrificing weekends and late nights for the sake of WORK. If it is under occassional circumstances, it is fine by me, but this term is not in auditors' vocabulary unfortunately. It had turned me into a robot for 6 months, and although I appreciate the breadth of knowledge I have obtained, I still think it is pathetic to be working those miserable long hours just to meet what everyone ironically knows as IMPOSSIBLE deadline. If your extra-effort goes appreciated, aka salary is very handsome, above the industry-average or of those who work from 8-5, then yea, just keep your mouth shut and deal with it, but NO. We subject ourselves to it because everyone else in the office is doing it, hence we think it is NORMAL, when it is not. Voicing out would mean you're complaining about things other people can deal with. Well, guess what, THERE IS MORE TO LIFE than spending non-paid working hours in the office until 2am every single day.

• It had taken a toll on my motivation. Going back home late means no time for yourself to any other thing than sleeping. And even that, we still wake up at 4am to continue work. So we go to work feeling lethargic and tired, no mood to dress up and deal with clients. Imagine doing this everyday, coupled with weekend classes and oh, outstation jobs.

• Unless Malaysia can emulate the auditors' working style of those in European countries, whereby amazingly they can go back at 5pm everyday and still get the work done, I will continue to "complain", "nag", whatever you want to call it, because i consider as modern-day slavery and unfair treatment to be subjected to Malaysian auditors' lifestyle.

• Never in my life have I hated the word "budget" so much, where we cannot claim our effort and yet the senior management expects the work to be done.

• So for now Abah, I just don't know if I want to go back to audit. If I do, it won't be because I love it anymore, it would be for and ONLY for the sake of 3 years experience as a last resort if I don't find other career opportunities that interest me.